The history of the domestication of horses has had a breakthrough discovery. Archeologists have found signs that we bred and milked the animals 5500 years ago. A millennium earlier than previously thought.

I didn't even know they milked horses for human consumption. Apparently, there has been a popular alcoholic beverage consumed for centuries called Kumis, made from fermented horse milk. It is made like wine and consumed like beer in many cultures. I also read that horse milk is better for you nutritionally and most closely resembles human milk. It also won taste tests beating out cat, cow and dog milk.

I am at a loss, who taste tests these things? There is so much that I don't know about the world. What else have we milked?

Well, Google says a Goat mixed with a spider gene produces milk enhanced with a silk protein that is so strong they are using it to make bullet proof vests.
Genetics are making mad scientists dreams come true. What can we make have special powers next? Why aren't we genetically enhancing ourselves? I read that they can identify and eliminate the cancer gene in newborns. Screw that. We should inject them with some sort of special gamma rays that they emit and it kills anyone's cancer that stands near them. I would also really like night vision.

They could inject me with cat eyes and I could be all stealthy and ninja-like. I would jump down off the roof with my kangaroo legs and stop the potential robber in the dark. He'd be like, "whoa, where did you come from?", and I'd say, "hush, hush, little evil robber man. We're taking you to the pokey.", 'cause that's what coppers call jail.

In conclusion, I think I would try a little of this horse's milk. It's supposed to taste like hazelnut and be easier to digest than the cow's milk.

Okay. I will do it. In exchange I want to be updated daily on the advances we're making in genetically splicing adult dna with any animals. I might not be that picky about my special skills. I could get excited about something as simple as a little ant dna. I could lift so much stuff. Maybe start a moving business. You never know. You gotta be thinking on your feet here. The possibilities are endless.

I promise to use my powers only for good.

I'm not sure this lady knows how to milk a horse.