I should preface this post with the statement that I love animals and, despite eating them, would never intentionally drop kick one of them for no reason.
I am presently staying at a friends house while I finalize my vacation plans and I have just had the unfortunate experience of meeting the "tame" cat that runs the place. The cat is named Whisper which is, in my opinion, the opposite of this particular cat. She is eleven years old and in heat. Whisper is the loudest cat that has ever roamed the planet. Her name is a cruel joke on the world. It's like naming Marilyn Monroe, Sober. Whisper wakes up around 11pm and begins her rounds of enticing people to pet her only to hiss and snap and claw until she is satisfied that you're bleeding and hoping she knows that it's all dogs go to heaven, not cats. Then, just as you go to bed and drift away into never never land, she begins the cry for her never found mate. It's long and annoying and has no rhyme or reason and, just when you think that she couldn't possible have anything else to say, it starts anew. I bought earplugs today.
Come to think of it, I guess I really shouldn't be too hard on the old girl. Look at her situation, she is 11 years old and she's not getting any younger. She has only wanted to get laid her whole life. She is an indoor cat and can only moan loudly through the walls, hoping to entice a wandering stray or the ears of the neighboring gigolo cat. What with Bob Barker and animal rights activists I think our little Whisper here is just about the last of her kind. She is like that 60 year old Indian woman that just had a baby, old and fertile. Except that I think the Indian lady probably can't say she's a virgin like our Whisper. Not that she wouldn't jump at the chance, but bless that poor cat that makes its way through the claw fanged passion that is Whisper.
So now I've come to the conclusion that I am going to take her to be fixed this weekend, with my friend's consent. Still though, 11 years of horny? I feel like I should find her a one night stand before I do.
Do you think the SPCA covers that? I think I'll put a note in the suggestion box if they don't.
